Behold the Kickmen overview

Overview

Behold the Kickmen comes from Size Five Games and is published by Size Five Games. It arrived on Steam on Jul 20, 2017, and it sits naturally among Single-player, Steam Achievements, Partial Controller Support, and Family Sharing. SteamPulse tracks it across Windows, macOS, and Steam so readers get a quick useful snapshot, not just a wall of numbers.

Players and reviews

Behold the Kickmen's latest SteamPulse observation recorded 0 players at 4 October 2026 - 09:14:41 UTC, with a tracked peak near 2. This peak is the highest value in the available SteamPulse record and may not include activity before tracking began. Player reaction is 78% positive across 522 reviews.

Language and system requirements

Behold the Kickmen is available in 1 languages including:

3 regional rating boards including dejus, steam germany, and igrs

Sales, recommendations, and streams

Behold the Kickmen has sold up to 11,175 units and has 375 Steam recommendations. The estimated VGI revenue is $31,363. On Twitch, 0 streamers are live with around 0 total watchers.

Behold the Kickmen overview details

Behold the Kickmen combines live player counts with reviews, pricing, platform support, Store metadata, dated player history, media, recent news, and related games.

Steam Store description

BEHOLD THE KICKMEN started as a silly Twitter joke, and evolved like a beautiful flower into the year's least-exciting and mostly-incorrect Football Simulation. It's football, as seen through the eyes of someone with no understanding of, or interest in, the Laws of Football. Start at the bottom of the Big Boring British Football Spreadsheet system and grind your way up, gruelling match after gruelling match, to become the best at the football that anyone's ever seen, and win the World Cup for your mantelpiece. FEATURES: Kicking, Passing, Tackling, Squad Management and Doing Goals over and over. There's even a full Story mode, crammed with overblown melodrama and inane decisions to be made. TWO WAYS TO PLAY! Hate football? No problem! The entire game can be re-skinned at the flip of a switch into a Dystopian Future Bloodsport! PLEASE NOTE: Kickmen has NO ONLINE MULTIPLAYER and NO LOCAL MULTIPLAYER, it's Single Player ONLY. Please don't buy it thinking it's at all sociable, because it isn't. Why, you ask? Because I wanted to make a Single Player game, I didn't want to make a Multiplayer game.

SteamPulse editorial summary

Behold the Kickmen is listed as a game with $0.99 (75% off from $3.99). It supports Windows and macOS, belongs to Single-player, Steam Achievements, Partial Controller Support, and Family Sharing, and is associated with Action, Casual, Indie, and Sports. SteamPulse's latest observation records 0 players at 4 October 2026 - 09:14:41 UTC, a tracked peak of 2, and 78% positive reviews.

Overview tags

ActionSportsIndieCasualFootball (Soccer)

Highlighted achievements

Support and legal notes

Real questions answered from SteamPulse data, including live players, monthly momentum, review sentiment, regional audience signals, Twitch activity, and current Steam pricing.